Dream Work

Hidden unconsciousness – a rational, but unconscious thought.
I was dreaming running and being afraid of vampires. And I need to say that this dream was so strong, because I never watch any films about vampires. The content of the dream surprised me more than the context. They were trying to lure me and take a bite from my neck, kind of playfully, some times more aggressively. I was running from these vampires. The whole dream was all divided in episodes, as in films that are without continuum but we all understand from the content what happened. The next episode – I am a vampire myself. I understand that they have caught me and I’ve become a vampire myself. The next thing I understand that there are bad vampires and good vampires in my dream. The bad vampires were after me and we were flying high in an old opened space abandoned palace or mansion. I was trying to protect some old good vampire lady. The next cut episode – I am sitting on a street on the curb and sucking my own blood from my hand.

I’ve discussed this dream with many people, there were many explanations, but the one that I came up with that makes the most sense to me is, that I am the one who is killing myself. Not my job, not the stress, not my life, it’s me who is my own problem.

Too much Sangria already!

Wake Up

One dream that made an impact on me, and it haunts me ever since. I was dreaming that I was running in a hurdles race around a stadium, leaping over one after another of these obstacles. The hurdles were so high, maybe ten feet tall. I was jumping over them with such an amazement and joy that I could do that.
And then my sister came by, and asked me what I was doing. I wanted to show her, I said “Look, look!" And then I couldn’t jump. It was all gone. I could hardly move.

The dream was so clear and colourful, it was hard to forget it. I was thinking what could that mean? A friend interpreted it as a hidden fear of my sister and a feeling of inadequacy in relation to her, but I completely rejected it. My own interpretation and a feeling about the dream was that I may have anxiety about performance. When I was doing it alone it was so easy, but as soon I had to show it to someone I froze. (I realize, too, that dreams have to be interpreted in context of what went on the day before, for example, having had contact with my sister, or having had to perform at the music conservatory). The other explanation that I had, was that it may be that my brain is my biggest enemy. I can do things without thinking about it, as soon as I am conscious of doing it, I find all kinds of difficulties. Which is true about me, I am very critical about myself, always find reasons why I can’t do something, I am not good enough.